#6: Venus Fly Traps

Today marks the halfway point of my seventh-month contract here onboard the Veendam.  I’ve certainly enjoyed some great adventures so far, but I suppose what I’ve been experiencing recently has been somewhat of a “midlife crisis”- midlife meaning midway through the life of my contract. I’ve mostly settled into a routine- visiting the same 6 New England cities every 7 days, performing 4 nights a week, safety drills twice a week, teaching line dance classes, scoping out the awesome dessert selection after dinner.  But outside of this rhythm, life onboard has me… well, bored.  Through many a humbling conversation, sponsored by terrible Wi-Fi and the amazing man who has to put up with all my crazy antics (Dankie, JJ <3), I now acknowledge I have a LOT of free time.  (Good practice for retirement?)

However, I thought I was doing a good job to fill this time.  I explore new coffee shops in nearly every port.  I’ve taken up running in port to feel the wind in my hair and the money I’m not spending still in my pocket.  I’ve been flying through the many dramatic seasons of Game of Thrones.  And I’ve even inadvertently become the leader of the Crew Recreational Committee, planning crew parties, crew talent shows and teaching English classes for crew.  I do crossword puzzles, I study Afrikaans, I maintain a monthly budget, I read in a long-distance book club with my NYC friends, I have this blog I (rarely) write in… I have soooo many hobbies- clearly!  What more could I possibly do??  And then the words of a loving friend, Yasa, sweetly reminded me that a hobby is something you feel no obligation to do, but simply do it for enjoyment.  Not to please anyone else or meet any deadlines.  And humbled again, I struggled to name one thing that I don’t have an ounce of dread at the thought of doing, but do simply for FUN. 

It’s safe to say life hit a new low when I found myself sitting at the Glitter Bean Café in Halifax, Nova Scotia sipping on a Glitter Latte and reading a Buzzfeed article entitled, “29 Hobbies For People WhoReally Want A Hobby But Have No Idea Where To Start.”  (I’m not kidding!  Click on the link to see for yourself.)  I even took about 4 different quizzes to help me find new hobbies that’d be a good fit for my personality.  My favorite result?  “Growing Carnivorous Plants.”  (Still not kidding!)  The description stated,

“Sometimes dealing with people exhaust you, but that’s only because you have such a tender soul that you have to protect it carefully.  Send a message that your nurturing nature has a toothy edge by growing carnivorous plants.  As you gently stroke and feed your baby Venus Fly Traps, others will finally understand that you’re a warm and helpful person, but your boundaries are sharp and clear.” 

A toothy edge?!  Seriously?!  It wasn’t exactly the guidance I was looking for.  So here I am, returning to this blog I started to chronicle the best and worst parts of all 216 days onboard… no wonder I’ve gotten behind schedule!  That’s a lot of days for me to write about, not to mention for you to read about!  And I regret to confess blogging has lost its excitement for me, no longer something I look forward to but feel burdened to keep up with.  But why?  Why do I need to put these parameters on writing if it’s meant to be for fun?  (If only turning fun into a chore was considered a hobby…)  The truth is “it’s my blog, and I can write what I want to.”  So today I am letting go of the expectations I’ve put on myself with this blog and am writing with freedom!  I am re-learning how to relax and how to ENJOY!

Upon further reflection I think watching the Green Bay Packers play and taking bubble baths (not necessarily simultaneously) could each be considered my hobbies, but the fact remains that I live on a SHIP.  And because I neither have control over the television network nor a bathtub, both of these things are nearly impossible right now.  So I open the floor to all of you!  Comment below with your favorite hobbies and why you like them!  If you like to read, send some book recommendations my way!

As always, thanks for reading.  And especially this week, thanks for making life more FUN!